"Double tall soy mocha cappuccino. To go!"

So they went away by themselves in the campaign bus to a Starbucks. But many who saw them leaving recognized them and drove their hybrids from all the towns and got there ahead of them. When Obama arrived and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. So he began talking to them about hope and change and the future and stuff.

By this time it was late in the day and the Starbucks needed to close for their national barista training, so his staff came to him. "This is a small Starbucks," they said, "and it's already very late. Send the people away so they can go to the surrounding coffeehouses and buy themselves something to drink."

But he answered, "You give them something to drink." They said to him, "That would take eight months of consulting fees! Are we to go and spend that much on lattes and give it to them to drink?"

"How many lattes do you have?" he asked. "Go and see." When they found out, they said, "Five—and two frappuccinos."

Then Obama directed them to have all the people sit down in groups in the park nearby. So they sat down in groups of hundreds and fifties. Taking the five lattes and the two frappuccinos and looking to Washington, D.C., he gave thanks and picked up the lattes.

Then he gave them to his disciples to set before the people. He also passed the two frappuccinos among them all. They all drank and were wired, and the staff picked up twelve Ventis-worth of extra espresso drinks. The number of the men who had drank was five thousand. And Michelle was able to check her Gmail account.

Previous unconfirmed Obamiracles can be found here.